Saturday 3 December 2016

2016 - I am so OVER you!!

So we are in December of 2016 and it has been a pretty shitty year, and the last month looks like it will be shitty too.

After moving at the beginning of the year, things have gone pretty much downhill since then.   I do love whee I am living, and have fantastic neighbours who have helped me so very much.

And I've needed help.  My health has been not good.  And it's frustrating the hell out of me.

I can barely walk due to having a wound on each foot.  And that is annoying.   My blood sugars are well under control, I try to do all the right tings, and yet I still got ulcers on my feet.   

One of them is really worrying.  I am basically under the care of the Podiatrists at the Prince Charles Hospital now, as well as the Northside Community Health Centre (part of the prince Charles Hospital) and that includes an Orthopedic specialist, and my GP.  I suspect that the only way I could be more closely monitored is if I was actually in hospital.

Which is the last thing that I want.

But I am terrified.   I went for a bone scan of my right foot on Friday - and I am hoping that there is no bone infection at all.   

It's also going to confirm how damaged my right foot is - though we already know that it is pretty well permanently damaged.  

I am terrified that I won't be able to walk.   Terrified that I will need to have a serious operation on my right foot - and so have to miss even more work.   I already have no leave except for 10 days rec leave.  If  have to take more, I am hoping that I can get early access to long service leave, as if I have to use my super (which is 87% of my pay) I may not be able to ay all my bills each fortnight.  

So I am hoping that 2017 will see things look up.   I want to be able to do little things - walk without pain.  Walk without having to use my cane.   Be able to attend a tourney.  

I want to be able to be at History Alive 2017 and be able to actually walk around and visit my Stallies and Display people.   

I'd like to be able to go one day without crying.

I shall try and see how I go.